Drove home from Mom's Assisted Living Facility in tears today

[alcina]

5. Done the primal scream quite a few times

I found that shorter more frequent visits really helped reduce the frustration. She was obsessed about a certain topic that was pretty painful for me, and she would bring it up over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over. You get the picture. If you're in a position to do this, I highly recommend it. In my last few months living near her, I visited her daily for coffee -- either at her place or for a quick outing. That was sooo much easier than the 4-hour visits and outings I had previously tried.

Of course, now her Alzheimer's is much worse, and I'm 3000 miles away; so when I visit, I spend the whole day with her. She's a different person, and most of what she talks about is a life long before I ever knew her.

Yeah, this is one fucked up cruel disease.

One piece of advice given to me -- which I'll admit I still have trouble following -- is this: Don't beat yourself up for getting impatient or snippy. Praise yourself for being a loving child who makes time to visit the parent who raised you.