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Bereavement

agingdem

(8,563 posts)

6. forgiveness is overrated

Reply to Grasswire2 (Original post)

Wed Aug 7, 2019, 01:19 PM

Aug 2019

unless your son can wipe the abuse from his memory then what's the point of forgiveness?...my childhood was a violent abusive one and I feel the pain a parent inflicts on child, be it physical, emotional, or both is, unforgivable..as far as I'm concerned granting forgiveness for the unforgivable is license to do it again...cynical I know, not very Christian, I know, but I'm Jewish and my G-d is not a forgiving G-d..

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19 replies

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My ex husband (abusive narcissist) is dying. [View all] Grasswire2 Aug 2019 OP

you answered perfectly!!! gopiscrap Aug 2019 #1

Does he have to do that in person? dawg day Aug 2019 #2

I agree. Let him shed a tear for what might have been, and donate the airfare to a charity Croney Aug 2019 #4

yes, there are two other siblings -- one of them a minister, actually. And a third wife. Grasswire2 Aug 2019 #5

Being there for the sake of his siblings, if they love him, is worthwhile. lostnfound Aug 2019 #9

I agree with your answer to your son duforsure Aug 2019 #3

forgiveness is overrated agingdem Aug 2019 #6

Not a forgiving G-d? JudyM Aug 2019 #14

consider the Holocaust... agingdem Aug 2019 #16

I get that. JudyM Aug 2019 #17

For His Own Healing, Your Son Should Say Goodbye to His Father, If He Can dlk Aug 2019 #7

My father was not a part of my life left-of-center2012 Aug 2019 #8

that's what this son is experiencing as loss... Grasswire2 Aug 2019 #11

Making the visit could trigger an emotional setback. littlemissmartypants Aug 2019 #10

I went to my mother's deathbed Chalco Aug 2019 #12

That was so kind of you, Chalco. JudyM Aug 2019 #15

that was a pretty amazing experience orleans Aug 2019 #18

Thanks! Chalco Aug 2019 #19

I think your advice was excellent. Golden Raisin Aug 2019 #13