this is a major, major eclipse

[magical thyme]

8. that content in meditating is where it begins

You can go back to that as often as you need or want. It's where you can find your dream.

I've had a lifetime to learn to take care of myself, and it's taken a lifetime. Even now, though, I'm going to skip getting my tooth capped -- it's holding up just fine on its own -- and re-direct that money into living my dream. There is no point in living, otherwise.

I didn't always work this hard, or even close to it. Hah! I slept until almost 10am on Saturday, and had a hell of a time getting out of bed when I finally did. But I needed the rest desperately, and I was dreaming right up until I got up. Getting my mini-farm introduced me to hard labor. First packing and moving 17 years worth of stuff, plus all my critters and all of their stuff, was major work. And every thing since then has been far harder than I ever anticipated.

I give up all the time. Every day, every hour or so. Then I do something else -- nap, eat, DU, something. And then when I'm ready, I go back to it, sometimes from a different angle or with a different expectation. It just sucks me back in.

You can't fail at making needed changes. Life will whack you upside the head and force the needed changes on you.

Meditation is where you will find the will to start over. First, you need to be content where you are. Then you will be ready. You will dream up your new dream and start taking steps. If life gets in your way, it may just be re-directing you slightly. You just keep taking one step at a time. And rest when you need to. Survey the landscape. Re-dream it. Every moment is a new beginning...