I have been counseling a male friend on understanding his first wife's abortion.

[CTyankee]

He is a good Democrat and politically pro-choice. But when he and his first wife had an unplanned pregnancy, after their two daughters were born, she abruptly said she wanted an abortion and would not even discuss her decision with him. He said he would have raised the child, it would not be unwanted. He had been devastated.

What we know now is that she had severe bipolar disorder and she is now institutionalized. I counseled him that we know now that she was developing her disorder and she might have felt she could not bring another child into the world. "Every woman has a good reason," I explained to him. Could he not accept the fact that she made that decision lovingly?

Because of her mental illness he had to get a lawyer and find another place to raise his young daughters. He was afraid that she might try to hurt them.

And what, I said, if his unborn child had been born? I am sure an unplanned pregnancy is a huge stress on a woman in her condition.

Is there anything else I could say to help him understand her position better?