Psych meds are primitive in relation to other therapies for medical conditions. In addressing anti-psychotics and mood stabilizers, the impact of the drug is to address the "positive" symptoms (the psychosis and mania that are obvious and disturbing to others), but have little or no impact on the "negative" symptoms (cognitive impairment, lack of motivation, poverty of thought). The relief granted by the meds often leaves the person desperate for help with those symptoms that are not even touched by psychotropics.
Complicating the problem is a serious symptom called anasognosia. This is a physical brain deficit that blinds a person to their own illness. They are not in denial. They are unable to recognize their own peril, or the impact that the disease has on others. Functional MRIs of non-compliant schizophrenic patients compared to Alzheimer's patients with lack of situational awareness show similar features as certain regions of the brain don't "light up".
You may need to assess what YOU are willing to tolerate. Your loved-one can not get better if your life becomes subsumed in their chaos and drama. It is critical to your loved-one that YOU be honest with them. DO NOT BECOME AN ENABLER! Set boundaries and stick to them. Explain to your loved-one that their refusal to stay on meds is creating consequences. Ask them how they plan on maintaining relationships or take care of their needs if they are constantly in chaos. Be direct and honest with them about your willingness to be part of their drama. If you are not getting some professional help, I strongly urge you to consider it.
I speak from experience with an adult son who was non-compliant for five years. Those years were hell. Addiction, arrests, jail, restraining orders...... After we finally stopped our co-dependent relationship, he was forced to make a choice for recovery. He has been sober, in counseling, and now has started working at a part-time.
Resources:
National Alliance for Mental Illness. (NAMI) Find your local chapter and take the 12 week "Family to Family" course. It is free, and you will learn much from others walking in your shoes. Most chapters also offer peer-led family support groups.
Book:
"I'm Not Sick, I Don't Need Any Help" by Torrey Fuller of the Treatment Advocacy Center. This is an organization dedicated to helping individuals (and families) seek legislation that would re-define incapacity, and allow for compelled treatment in a crisis BEFORE someone is a "threat to themselves or others"
Good luck on this difficult journey. Remember; It is NOT selfish to take care of you own needs. Your loved-one needs you to be healthy and honest in order for BOTH of you to be safe.
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