Mental Health Support

lark

(24,468 posts)

62. Hey Glamrock, vent all you want. Lots of us have had hard times with our older loved ones.

Sun Feb 20, 2022, 09:03 AM

Feb 2022

Every situation is somewhat unique and you landed in the middle of a morally ambiguous one that would test the soul of a saint.

Your mom is so lucky to have you to take care of her and you should be proud of what you are doing for her. I know the guilt, felt it when I had to approve taking mom off the vent, knowing there was only a 10% chance she could breathe on her own. I could have ordered extra steps, like my sister wanted us to do, but the doctors said this would be very painful for mom and most likely she would last no more than 2 weeks. All the doctors, moms pastor and her sisters agreed that she needed to be disconnected, but it still was the hardest thing I've ever done.

Edit history

Please sign in to view edit histories.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

69 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

This just flat out sucks [View all] Glamrock Feb 2022 OP

Hon, we are with you. Don't you worry about bringing down anyone's day. xo CurtEastPoint Feb 2022 #1

i dont know a single person who wants a lingering death. mopinko Feb 2022 #2

You're not a selfish asshole MN2theMax Feb 2022 #3

Maybe find a support group. LakeArenal Feb 2022 #4

Sounds very, very difficult people Feb 2022 #5

Been there. nancy1942 Feb 2022 #6

Take care, man MerryHolidays Feb 2022 #7

I'm so sorry XanaDUer2 Feb 2022 #8

I am so sorry. jmbar2 Feb 2022 #9

yes. it. does. stopdiggin Feb 2022 #10

Frustrating and heartbreaking pandr32 Feb 2022 #11

My mom lingered on for over a year after Hospice said she would die and I remember wanting it to be Maraya1969 Feb 2022 #12

Vent here as much as you need. sheshe2 Feb 2022 #13

Hugs bro Duncanpup Feb 2022 #14

Hugs bro Duncanpup Feb 2022 #15

So sorry to read what you, Mrs. Glam, & mom are going through. SheltieLover Feb 2022 #16

There is no need to apologise. OldBaldy1701E Feb 2022 #17

I'm so sorry, for both of you, & vent all you want, we're here to listen. CaptainTruth Feb 2022 #18

Be easy on yourslf. Your thoughts are normal and just thoughts. Been, not exactly there, but c-rational Feb 2022 #19

I took care of my mother as she died from a brain tumor. I can therefore say I don't know what... NNadir Feb 2022 #20

I am so sorry, Glamrock. crickets Feb 2022 #21

I lost my mom when I was sixteen. momta Feb 2022 #22

I'm sorry for your plight, and sorry for not having anything profound or helpful to offer. BobTheSubgenius Feb 2022 #23

No thanks necessary. Cracklin Charlie Feb 2022 #24

don't correct or argue, it just aggravates both of you Kali Feb 2022 #25

that is what I would want if it were me. that and maybe a small revolver left where demigoddess Feb 2022 #26

Take care of yourself, man. If you don't, somebody will end up... dchill Feb 2022 #27

Completely understand your need to vent. hippywife Feb 2022 #28

Here are my thoughts mgardener Feb 2022 #29

... alwaysinasnit Feb 2022 #30

vent away kanda Feb 2022 #31

A little guilt is an OK thing. hay rick Feb 2022 #32

My mom also had Lewy Body dementia and Parkinson's. Sunny Daze Feb 2022 #33

If you need to scream at somebody, reach out cousin. The Polack MSgt Feb 2022 #34

Going through the same thing. Dustlawyer Feb 2022 #35

It will work out stevil Feb 2022 #36

Just hang on to every one of the minutes of your real mom. appleannie1 Feb 2022 #37

You're safe here Dave in VA Feb 2022 #38

I hope you have a turntable so you can play those old Beatles albums often Warpy Feb 2022 #39

So very sorry... PittBlue Feb 2022 #40

I am so sorry. All you can do is the best you can. If you are asking yourself the questions, you LoisB Feb 2022 #41

My two cents... 2naSalit Feb 2022 #42

big hug, Glam Claire Oh Nette Feb 2022 #43

Sorry to hear and be easy on yourself Glam. KPN Feb 2022 #44

Glam, I'm so sorry. What you're going through is terribly difficult. highplainsdem Feb 2022 #45

My MIL has the same diagnosis LittleGirl Feb 2022 #46

Music is an amazing thing for dementia victims mahina Feb 2022 #47

My husband had LBD. mnhtnbb Feb 2022 #48

It truly sucks Bayard Feb 2022 #49

Found you here today, Saturday.. Deuxcents Feb 2022 #50

My Dad has Parkinson's AwakeAtLast Feb 2022 #51

I am so sorry, Lewy Body sucks. It sounds like she's thinking about food, stocking up before the war uppityperson Feb 2022 #52

so sorry Glamrock Skittles Feb 2022 #53

Next time she has to pee I_UndergroundPanther Feb 2022 #54

Caretaking is hard. It's impossible to do it perfectly. live love laugh Feb 2022 #55

... flying rabbit Feb 2022 #56

Feeling you. JudyM Feb 2022 #57

My mom's deterioration was long and slow... 9 years in the "memory care" unit. 3Hotdogs Feb 2022 #58

Lost my mother to Parkinson's and dementia 31 years ago. TNNurse Feb 2022 #59

My dad had Parkinson's but not LBD. The Parkinson's took him roughly 5 years ago and it ... SWBTATTReg Feb 2022 #60

Words can't express how I feel for you SallyHemmings Feb 2022 #61

Hey Glamrock, vent all you want. Lots of us have had hard times with our older loved ones. lark Feb 2022 #62

damn markie Feb 2022 #63

Love you, Glam. ❤ littlemissmartypants Feb 2022 #64

I am so, so, sorry, Glam. Diamond_Dog Feb 2022 #65

I'm sorry cate94 Feb 2022 #66

I am so sorry. Loryn Feb 2022 #67

Sorry to hear, will be thinking of you. grantcart Feb 2022 #68

Your mom was probably talking about running a battery off a potato. femmedem Feb 2022 #69