Mom was just diagnosed with cancer in her kidney.

[Ed Suspicious]

I know i am active and abrasive outside of this group in support of my favorite candidates and in opposition to others. I hope that what happens outside this group stays outside this group. I just want to get some advice from regular human beings when I post here.

Last night I learned my mother, 59 (I think. Is it sad that I don't even know her age?), was informed by her doctor that she has cancer in one of her kidneys. I have no idea what stage it is at or what her prognosis is at this time. She has been producing blood in her urine for a couple weeks. They did some testing that revealed the heart of the problem. It was cancer.

I talked to her on the phone last night about 15-20 minutes after she found out. She was not taking the news well. I called back to talk to her a little later and she seemed a bit more subdued and able to talk about things. There still is a lot to be learned, but when faced with her own mortality, she was not going to go quiet into that good night. Now this isn't some noble march along the doctor's prescribed path that she was talking about. Her rage, for last night, took the form of "I'm going to drink myself into a stupor. I'm not just going to lie in bed and waste away." And then came more and more tears. She was inconsolable.

So I guess I would like to know what you guys, what anybody might say to help me to help her navigate this. I really don't know what to say to her or to myself. I don't know. I told her that I think she needs to wait longer to find out more details before we make any rash choices. I also told her that if she decided to get drunk after it all, she should do so with somebody, and she should try to stay safe. I guess I figure a night or two of petulant rage resulting in inebriation doesn't sound that out of order, but at the same time I don't want her to make a habit of it and I would like her to deal with and accept the process that she now faces, and I hope I can help her somehow to balance hope with acceptance of our common human eventuality.

I don't know. I just wonder if you might have a few words of wisdom to pass along to the oldest son and his sick mother.