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[IngridsLittleAngel]

308. I'll try to answer this fairly...

As some of the other replies have pointed out, right now trans and NB people are finding themselves being targeted by the GOP, being skewered in the right-wing media, and being threatened by extreme-right domestic terrorists. Right now, that is a far bigger concern than whether or not the grammar "sounds right."

If a person says they prefer she, use she. If a person says they prefer he, use he. If a person says they prefer they or them, use they or them. Same when it comes to names. The center for UCLA from 1966-69 is Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. The winner of the 1960 light heavyweight gold medal is Muhammad Ali. The winner of the 1976 gold medal in the decathlon is Caitlyn Jenner.

I don't want to be snarky, but, ask Grammarly how to properly phrase and use they/them pronouns. I try but I'm no grammar expert myself anymore. I probably use too many commas, start too many sentences with "and", don't quite phrase perfectly, etc.. myself.

I can promise you, though, that if someone says "I prefer they/them" and you say "They is..." when it should be "They are...", that person will not be upset, as you're at least trying to accommodate their wishes and respect them. They won't feel the same way if in the name of "grammar" you opt for the wrong pronoun.

Hopefully this helps. And hopefully you can understand why some of the replies sound frustrated, to put it mildly. What should be a simple "if they prefer they, use they" seems to be going in circles and at times sounds like a debate over grammar instead of simply going with chosen pronouns.