shame

[Not Heidi]

On Magnolia near SSJ, I heard - no, felt - a thud. It was late, after 10 pm. I pulled over, got out, looked back, saw nothing.

Heard meows.

Went and knocked on a door. Called police to come and get her. They said no: cats aren't road hazards.

Went back to my car.

Heard meows.

Drove away.

I was 18.

Cross-posted Lounge

[irisblue]

1. Heidi

you made a bad choice when you were a kid, over the years of your life, you have done better.
I know that you have mentioned your cats before; this random DUer is telling you in love, stop beating yourself up. In particular using every distant memory that you have.

Hugs and forgiveness, if you want them from me

[Not Heidi]

2. accepted

with many thanks for your kindness.

Forgiveness is what I need - from myself. Working on it.

[hunter]

3. My mind went sideways in adolescence.

When I was 12 years old I knew everything.

Age 15 to 25 I was a wrecking ball, and too many times after.

In spite of therapy, meds, and locked psych wards, I'm still really good at beating myself up over some of it.

Sometimes that'll be the long nights I'm posting here on DU at 3 A.M. in the morning.

[Not Heidi]

5. hunter, my friend

[Not Heidi]

6. thank you

very much