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Rizen

(916 posts)
Thu Jul 17, 2025, 09:15 PM Jul 17

I'm sick of being the nice guy who finishes last.

I'm pissed off about people not respecting my time and getting back to me in a reasonable time frame. My cover artist (who I hired for a book I wrote) is taking a very long time then I got an emails saying the artist was unwell but has fully recovered. This is on the tail of having a death in the family. I've been waiting since February. I have a second book coming up and am seriously considering finding a different artist. Also I reached out to my beta reader and he hasn't even started reading my book; It's been 2 months. The last woman I dated came to me on a dating website then after a while she didn't respond to my texts for over a week, then I got a message saying that she's not in a good place to date but hopes we can be friends because she doesn't have any friends, so I said okay. She ghosted me anyway. I'm trying to get in contact with a lawyer about something but they never respond unless I email them several times. Even though I talked to my aunt and cousins about getting together on the Fourth of July weeks ahead of time they canceled on me because they had "Plans with friends". I'm sick of the BS and I'm not going to take it anymore. I'm sick of being the nice guy who finishes last.

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I'm sick of being the nice guy who finishes last. (Original Post) Rizen Jul 17 OP
I'd have to ask: What is your age? Many people go through what you're going though. chouchou Jul 17 #1
Flakes... They waste your time, They're wastin' mine JoseBalow Jul 17 #2
Well, the toilet went crazy Oeditpus Rex Friday #3
All what we got here's American made JoseBalow Friday #5
That whole album Oeditpus Rex Friday #8
I just realized Oeditpus Rex Saturday #9
I struggle to suppress the urge to rant about a need for more, better etiquette training. snot Friday #4
"I'm sick of being the nice guy who finishes last." LudwigPastorius Friday #6
I don't think the last human has been born yet. hunter Friday #7

chouchou

(2,163 posts)
1. I'd have to ask: What is your age? Many people go through what you're going though.
Thu Jul 17, 2025, 09:48 PM
Jul 17

It's easy to think that the unfairness of time and life are solely beating of just you. You know it's not.
I've known people who thought their unhappiness would follow them forever...and now they find
it hard to explain how easy life got so much better.
Take this with a grain of salt. The above words were me. .
Don't let the bastards get you down

Oeditpus Rex

(42,134 posts)
3. Well, the toilet went crazy
Fri Jul 18, 2025, 12:57 PM
Friday
yesterday afternoon
The plumber, he said, "Never flush a tampoon"
This great information cost me half a week's pay
And the toilet blew up later on the next day-ay-ay


Love that song.

JoseBalow

(7,978 posts)
5. All what we got here's American made
Fri Jul 18, 2025, 01:45 PM
Friday
It's a little bit cheesy, but it's nicely displayed.


Great stuff!

Oeditpus Rex

(42,134 posts)
8. That whole album
Fri Jul 18, 2025, 11:28 PM
Friday

is just terrific, with instrumentals like "Rubber Shirt" and slaps at American life like "Honey, Don't You Want a ManLike Me?" Love "Baby Snakes," too, with all the weirdly done vocals ("Society of Motion Picture and Television Engineers" and "Dit dit...dit dit... dit dit... dit dit...")

I liked "Bobby Brown" until I got "woke" and realized what it was about. Kinda the same with "Jewish Princess."

Note: The same guy who turned me on to Zappa also got me into Pink Floyd, Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. and Monty Python. I owe my cultural life to him.

snot

(11,214 posts)
4. I struggle to suppress the urge to rant about a need for more, better etiquette training.
Fri Jul 18, 2025, 01:35 PM
Friday

Things like "ghosting" are imho unacceptable. Communicate about what's going on – whether due to unforeseen circumstances or your own changed priorities – and give the other person an opportunity, without avoidable delay, to decide whether to wait for you, write you off completely, or give you another chance another time. Ghosting is not only rude, it's inefficient.

(Another pet peeve: If you initiate a phone call, after someone at the other end says hello, you should say: "This is [your first name] [your lastname] with [your business entity if applicable]; may I please speak with [Mr./Mrs./Ms.] [first name] [last name]?" Because if you don't want to reveal who you are or you're not sure who you're calling, you probably shouldn't be calling at all.)

(I also abhor name-calling. If you have a problem with someone's behavior, state the facts of what they did or didn't do and how it affects you or those you care about; and if your objections don't hold water on that basis, you should probably re-examine them. Name-calling merely escalates hostilities and usually just impedes any progress toward an actual solution.)

(Thanks for letting me rant a bit.)

hunter

(39,686 posts)
7. I don't think the last human has been born yet.
Fri Jul 18, 2025, 06:18 PM
Friday

Doesn't matter how fast one goes, we all cross the same finish line. Nobody is "last."

Unless a big rock hits the earth, then all bets are off.

That's happened before.

Even so, the dinosaurs survived that global catastrophe as birds and most birds are pretty fantastic.

One of my favorite movies is Seeking a Friend for the End of the World.

It doesn't take the end of the world to sort out meaning of life, however. If I got a do-over in this life I'd definitely take a pass on some of my own personal "end of the world" experiences. I might have been a better person without the PTSD, but who knows? Maybe I'd just be more obnoxious.

It's possible to "be a nice guy" and be assertive enough to protect yourself too. These are not mutually exclusive.

It is, in fact, very easy to be a nice guy when you are secure in your own person.

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