What's the talent for attracting Mentors? Mystery to me.

[UTUSN]

Last edited Fri Dec 6, 2024, 05:52 PM - Edit history (1)

I operated all my working life starting at the bottom, under-employed and over-performing, observing the rules and expectations, waiting my turn, a scarce and scant 2 or 3 *moments* of a helping hand or getting a break. Yet have seen three or so instances of people getting major boosts from powerful Mentors - pathways to plum advancement. Had a couple of bosses less academically credentialed, while I never called attention to it.

The young "networkers" in the '90s were like lightning in stepping on up the ladder of Mentors, one after the other and discarding the Replaced ones. This was in the days when the reality shows about Survivor and "voting off the island" popped up. They were playing cut throat.

The master of brown nosing was a young dude who knew the exact line and never crossed it in the kissing up talent: Was at the ready to identify and flatter, but "If you can fake sincerity" you've got it down.

Saw one dude who had incurred the castigation from THE most powerful boss and was demoted, but he knew the game he wanted to play and went through months of arbitration, Corrective Action - translation: GROVELING and assuring that he had been wrong about whatever and was contrite and would forever improve himself - jump through the hoops, as he himself said.

*** I've got what Ben AFFLECK called a "resting face" of severity, not a beaming fun expression. Most of all, never kissing up. So is that it? - making some insecure higher-ups feel threatened, so didn't attract Mentors, the opposite.

[CrispyQ]

1. "...under-employed and over-performing..."

I checked out groceries through college, in a union store, so you knew everyone's rate of pay. Even back then they knew how many customers you checked out & your total sales & it infuriated me that the checker next to me could be slow & even lose money from their till, but they made the same as me. I couldn't wait to finish college & get a real job where you were paid according to the quality work you did. LOL. The joke was on me.

As for the mentor thing, IMO that boils down to too many managers like the butt-kissers better than the worker bees. This is true everywhere. There are exceptions, but good managers are hard to find. Also, if you ever display a "I don't give a shit" attitude, it will never be forgiven. Can you tell I'm not fond of corporate culture?

[UTUSN]

2. You and me both. Am gone from it, thankfully. Hope you are. Ran into my old boss.

A few years ago at a doctor's office. The reception area was empty and I didn't even notice a spousal couple sitting in a corner. When I got to the exit, the male called out my name and ran up to me with his giant smile. He grabbed my hand to shake. I said, "You're still smiling, arncha." He dropped the smile and said, "Got to."

He knew I never kissed up but expected me to be glad to see him and somehow to retain the boss-employee paradigm, both of us retired. I turned away and walked out.

Incredibly, a few days later, two friends of mine and I walked into an empty, dark restaurant - and THERE HE WAS, sitting alone. We had to pass by him, and he said, without the smile, "We meet again, (name)." I said, "Yeah-yeah," and walked past.

There was a booth/cubicle thing setup in the place and after awhile a woman joined him. I peeked over the barrier and sat down to say to my friends, "It's not his wife." Later the skinny got to me that he had gone back to the job. He had been interviewing with somebody from the headquarters. He had recouped his smile for the interview.